unreliable doorstop

[temporal_affairs]

Here they are, having a cute post-death reunion!

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[temporal_affairs]

At the requisite moment, Timer ports in.

"Hi, babe," he says.

[gunpowdergelatine]

"Sweetie!"

The Joker beams and flings his arms around Timer, hugging him tight.

[temporal_affairs]

Hugs! "That didn't take long. You could've easily been cooling your heels for centuries, but you only died about an hour ago. What kinda sentence did they slap on you?"

[gunpowdergelatine]

"Mm, not one with Chainsaw," he says, "much to my disappointment."

He finds a pentagon on Timer's bandolier and teleports them both to Timer's house, because it is more fun to cuddle in.

[temporal_affairs]

"Who is it, then?"

[gunpowdergelatine]

"Jasmine."

[temporal_affairs]

"Ah, I got assigned to her in my time, but I fobbed it off on Eights. You'll probably have fun with her, too, she's a big name. Not as affable as Chainsaw's rumored to be. I believe the conventional wisdom is that she'll be meaner if you're male, though."

[gunpowdergelatine]

"Ooh. Fun."

[temporal_affairs]

"Well, you know, for torturer values of 'meaner'. I have no idea what she'll do if you explain you to her all friendly-like." Pause. "Your guide is going to be confused when you don't show. Oh well."

[gunpowdergelatine]

"Watch me care," he snorts. "Mm, let's go snuggle."

[temporal_affairs]

"All right. You want some of the coins back? Do you have any left on you?"

[gunpowdergelatine]

"I do nnnnot have any left on me," he says. "And I bet I'm not a mint anymore. Well, I can fix that."

He touches a hex.



He blinks at it.

"Innnnnnnnteresting," he says, and touches it again. This wish goes through.

[temporal_affairs]

"What?" Timer asks.

[gunpowdergelatine]

"I can make myself a mint but I can't make it stick," he says. "Not with a hex, anyway. And everybody keeps tellin' me I shouldn't try a star."

[temporal_affairs]

"Huh. Not sticking how?"

[gunpowdergelatine]

"Not sticking if I torch."

[temporal_affairs]

"Ah. So you'll wanna accumulate some hexes between each occasion of same, if you wanna be a mint as a general habit."

[gunpowdergelatine]

"Orrrrrrr," he says, "I could experiment."

[temporal_affairs]

"...With a star? Any warning you've paid attention to this long has to be all kinds of dire."

[gunpowdergelatine]

"What's it gonna do," he asks, "kill me again?"

[temporal_affairs]

"Wreck my place?" suggests Timer. "Torch me? I haven't tried it yet and I'm in no hurry."

[gunpowdergelatine]

"I'd go somewhere else, silly," he says, kissing the end of Timer's nose.

[temporal_affairs]

"Oh, well then. You're probably just fine."

[gunpowdergelatine]

Beaming, he kisses him again, then puts himself back on the brainphone network just because.

—And blinks.